Mental Health: Way to help relieve stress

Mental health is something that we tend to forget in the hustle and bustle of our everyday lives. Our mental health determines many things and we do not realize it, most of the time, until it is too late. Stress is also something that overpowers many of our daily routines. We want to accomplish many things on a daily basis, that we forget to stop and take a breath. 

Stress affects many things: sleep, digestion, mood, etc. When all these things are affected, we develop issues like anxiety, high blood pressure, depression, mood swings, and I am sure there are many more. 

As a person that suffers from anxiety (Tina), I have learned to find ways to eliminate stress and cope with things that are out of my control. I want to share with you different things that have worked and still work for me today. Before I do, I want to give you a little back story on when I reached my breaking point. 

It all started in 2018. I was struggling with my weight and with other personal issues that I am not ready to discuss. Then in  August, I began my Master’s degree while working full time. By this point I was already overwhelmed and going through my own personal battles. However, little did I know that would be the least of my worries. Schooling was tough, but come November, one of my students committed suicide; this took a toll on me. Soon after, my grandfather was admitted into the hospital. I had a gut feeling that things may not end well. After a month, he passed away. Less than a week after that, one of my alumni (we had just seen her a couple weeks prior) passed away in a massive car accident. 

Right before my grandfather passed in February, I was already dealing with anxiety and massive panic attacks. I was having heart palpitations, not sleeping, always tired, not wanting to do anything or participate in things I once loved. I was borderline depressed. As soon as mild panic attacks started occurring while driving, I started visiting doctors to rule out any other possible conditions or issues. My grandfather’s passing was what tipped me over the edge. I was at the point that I would wake up in the middle of the night screaming or gasping for air. I would catch myself stopping breathing at times.

On top of all this, I was also trying to figure out a way to stay active. I injured my knee and lost most of the elasticity and balance in my right knee. I had to give up kickboxing and many physical activities until my knee improved a little. I had already been kickboxing for three years. This was highly difficult for me. Lets just say that I started crying in the doctor’s office when he told me I had to give up kickboxing. Mind you this was one of the best ways I would relieve stress. 

Finally, my doctor was able to prescribe me anxiety meds that helped me. The only drawback was that I seemed too calm and quiet. In all honesty, it helped me immensely. It was what I needed to get through the last few months of school and work. What I needed, in order to think straight and find other outlets to decompress. While I had family there supporting me, I was fighting inside battles that I had to conquer on my own. Those battles took some time to overcome, but I did it and I am extremely proud of myself. I have come a long way. 

Disclaimer: we are all different and have our own battles to face. Mine may not seem like much in comparison to what some women and men go through, but for me, it was one of the hardest times in my life. 

Something as simple as writing in a journal goes a long way. Many of us have a hard time verbally expressing our feelings. So writing is a great way to write down and analyze our inner thoughts. Doing this helps clear the “fog” preventing you from thinking straight. 

I took up kickboxing. This was something I loved! After my boxing class, I would feel amazing. It truly did help in aiding the healing process. IT was a great workout for me mentally and physically. 

Another thing that helped was having “me days”. I started taking those more seriously. I was going to walk around somewhere, go get a massage, take myself out to lunch or dinner, maybe some shopping, go to the beach, go for a drive, or whatever else I would care to do. This helped a lot. During this time, I would laugh, cry, scream, and even say out loud what was in my head. Whatever I needed to do to reach some peace and clarity. As an educator, the students and curriculum can drain you daily, so this was also a way to disconnect from work and form that work-life balance. 

I started making it a point to take myself out to dinner once a week when I could focus on me, myself, and I. This started building up my confidence a little. Exactly what I needed to start getting back to the person I once was. I know that some of you may say that this is difficult to do, but that’s why you find something that works for you. If that is a few minutes to go walking around the neighborhood, do groceries alone, a silent drive on the way home from work, 30 minutes to binge watch a show, or whatever else that you want. A few other things that helped as well were cooking, baking, cleaning and organizing, and working out. 

I have been told several times “It must be nice” when I take time for myself. Yet, most people do not know everything that I have overcome internally. Over time, I learned that life is what you make of it, and you have to build routines that work for you. I have no shame in the life that I have created, and you shouldn’t either. 

Focusing on me, my worth, my values, and what I bring to the “table” changed my life. Fast forward to 2023 and after two failed relationships that set me back a bit, I took a year to myself. I was finally at a better state mentally, physically, and emotionally that I could actually embrace myself.  I was  happily single and did not want to date. I worried about myself, traveled, and did what I wanted to do. Getting to a better place overall also helped me lose 47 lbs. 

I came into 2024 a whole new person. I learned to worry about what I can control and not stress over what I cannot control. I was also a person that saw the good and the bad and would try to make the best of things. I had lost it for a while but now, I AM BACK. 

Click here for a list of many other ways to reduce stress and anxiety.